Annie's Testimony Page

When a friend asked me to write my testimony, at first I wanted to say:
"NO"!!!!! I just felt like it wasn't the time to share my testimony. I thought
that I would prefer to let my pages tell the story and God's word to stand
alone. I didn't want to deal with the past and dredge it all up again, but
the Lord laid the desire upon my heart to write my testimony and I wanted
to share it with you....

Growing up in the "church"...I thought that just going to a church service
on Sunday and being a good person was sufficient to "get me to Heaven",
until someone shared with me what the Bible says in:

Ephesians 2: 8 & 9.... "For by grace are you saved by faith, it is a gift
of God not of works lest any man should boast."

Then I saw what the Bible really said. It was as if a light went on in a
dark room. Being a doubting Thomas and I didn't want to hear what others
thought but instead I would say show me what the Bible says. I was quite
overwhelmed by this new discovery. It was amazing for me to really see
that verse and what it meant, for what seemed like the very first time.

Once I realized what GRACE (God's Righteousness at Christ's Expense)
meant I accepted Jesus as my Savior. Grace was not being good or good
enough......for if I arrived at heaven and God asked me why should I let
you in.........what could I say.......It was nothing I did.....it was a Gift
of God.... not the works or good deeds. Yes I realized that without Christ
coming to the earth and dying on the cross to pay the ultimate price I had
no right to enter heaven. He died just for me. How humbling this was.

We are all put on the potters wheel and He refines us like gold........

Lam 4:2 The precious sons of Zion, comparable to fine gold, how are
they esteemed as earthen pitchers, the work of the hands of the potter!

Rom 9:21 Hath not the potter power over the clay, of the same lump to
make one vessel unto honour, and another unto dishonour?

Isa 64:8 But now, O LORD, thou art our father; we are the clay, and
thou our potter; and we all are the work of thy hand.

Isa 48:9 For my name's sake will I defer mine anger, and for my praise
will I refrain for thee, that I cut thee not off.
Isa 48:10 Behold, I have refined thee, but not with silver; I have
chosen thee in the furnace of affliction.

Zec 13:9 And I will bring the third part through the fire, and will
refine them as silver is refined, and will try them as gold is tried:
they shall call on my name, and I will hear them: I will say, It is my
people: and they shall say, The LORD is my God.

"It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I
might learn thy statutes."
~Psalm 119:71~

The last few years of my life have been like the "Job" years in the Bible
with losses of many kinds. But to elaborate on them would not give the
Glory to the Lord. But more important than what they all are is, that He
sustained me through these horrific times when everyone else seemed to
desert me.

I feel that I should share one recent loss with you. My younger and only
brother "Billy" was killed in a tragic car accident on February 28th, 1996.
And since that day nothing has been the same.

I know that Billy is in heaven and that I will see him again. I thank the
Lord for this assurance. BUT.....grief and death seem to be never
expected......especially at such a young age...... When Billy died my life
was turned upside down....I knew that I was a Christian but it was a time
of reevaluating my belief system. What did I really believe and why were
some of the questions that came to the forefront. I don't know about you
but in my life I have always struggled with being in control. So if I trust
God and really trust Him.....then either He is in control or I am. There is
no in between. Could I really trust Him in ALL things? Did I really need
other people to approve and love me? Was it really OK to be all alone? Did
it matter what other people thought or said? HONESTLY.....yes I am
probably too sensitive.....and I do want every one to like me......BUT was
that realistic.....and was that what God wanted. I have learned so much
because of the losses in my life. I learned that only God really knows our
hearts and LOVES us unconditionally. People will disappoint us and fail
for after all they are only human.

"Grief, is a process by which we are allowed to value the loss, and be
healed of the loss, so that our life can go on. Just as the body knows
how to heal a cut, so the spirit uses the process of grief to heal the
injured parts of our soul. It is as if grief is the scab
that permits healing."
~Reverend Leigh Early~

One verse that really kept repeating itself over and over in my spirit was
John 3:16...."For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten
Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have
everlasting life.".....Billy left behind a mother and father, two sisters, a
niece and two nephews......and a son. A son so young, would he ever
remember his father. Someone said "God wouldn't take a father from his
son....and Billy would never leave his own son"......but the verse kept
coming to my mind.....that if God sacrificed His Son.....surely He knew
what He was doing in taking Billy so young.

When Billy died we received phone calls from lots of his friends. They said:
"We know that Billy was a Christian and we want to know how to become
one". Even in this tragedy God was using His Providential Hand to bring
more souls into the kingdom of heaven. The angels were singing that day.

If tears could build a stairway,
and memories were a lane,
I would walk right up to heaven
to bring you home again.
No farewell words were spoken
no time to say goodbye
you were gone before I knew it,
and only God knows why.
My heart still aches in sadness
and secret tears still flow,
what it meant to lose you,
no one will ever know.
Anonymous

My life is but a weaving
Between my Lord and me,
I cannot choose the colors
He worketh steadily.

Ofttimes He weaveth sorrow,
And I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper
And I, the underside.

Not till the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Shall God unroll the canvas
And explain the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful
In the Weaver's skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned.
~~Grant C. Tullar~~

Here is a song that was in my heart today as I
prepared this page to share with you......

Something Beautiful Something Good
All my confusion He understood
All I had to offer Him was brokenness and pain
But He made something Beautiful of My Life.
~ Bill and Gloria Gaither ~

"Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of
mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all of our
tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in trouble, by the
comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God."
~2 Corinthians 1: 3-4 KJV~

RSD ~ Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy

I have RSD. I have symptoms and problems with both my arms,
legs and left shoulder. Dispite my illness he still can use me on
the internet. I consider myself an "Internet Missionary"!

Here are my two favorite links for RSD:
Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Syndrome - (RSD)
RSD Puzzle List - I has questions & answers

I am amazed and humbled that the Lord can use me to encourage
others with my pages despite all my circumstances. But the
GRACE of God is sufficient! Thank you Lord!

To learn more about that visit: Annie's Chronic Pain/Illness Page

DKEGA's RSD Awareness Page: Karen has done an EXCEPTIONAL
job with her pages. Wish I had, had the very practical
information when I was first diagnosed.
Melinda's RSD and Me Page - She has RSD in her leg, but the
Lord has used this to start a Ministry for those dealing with
chronic pain. Pictures too.

Here are my two favorite links for RSD:
Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Syndrome - (RSD)
RSD Puzzle List - I has questions & answers

Other testimony pages that have touched my heart:

Featured Testimony: 4/27/98
Denice's Testimony Page - Denice has become a very fast and close
friend. Only the Lord could have brought use together. She has endured
many illnesses and is still is constant pain. But you will also see in her
life how that the Lord can take all that she has endured and use her to
comfort and challenge you to live your life daily for the Lord.

Past Featured Testimony Pages:
Linda's Testimony Page - Linda has done a wonderful job of explaining the
difference between "thinking" you will go to Heaven and "really knowing"
that you will. Jesus can and will make a difference in your life if you let
Him. Please visit Linda's testimony page. The time is so short and you
really need to know for sure that you will with be the Lord in Heaven
when you die.

My friend Peggie has a WONDERFUL devotional called:
Survival 101--A Christian Devotional from "Peggie's Well"

Other Related Pages by Annie:

Annie's Barnabas was an Encourager Page to be encouraged
or learn how to encourage others.
Annie's Bee an Internet Missionary Page what a wonderful
opportunity to share our faith with others
Annie's Comfort Page find comfort from the Word of God.
Annie's Chronic Pain/Illness Survivors Page are you a person
who endures with Chronic Pain or Survivor of Cancer?
Another page where you can find support and encouragement.
~A Message for You from Heaven~ This page will help you
during the holidays, when it seems the hardest time to cope
with our loss.
How to Cope with Grief & the Holidays Page The Holidays
are always a difficult time for people dealing with the loss
of loved ones.

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